From Expression to Analysis: EMDR Therapy
a union was formed. from my left brain to my right. wedding ring? because i merged the two. one band. one sound. i was once disconnected and found it outside of myself only to be reminded that true wholeness is within. & goddamn. that ish was hard than a mfr.omg i almost died. i see why opposites attract because doing the work within is what i call true trials and tribulations. pass the offering plate. i’m accepting all donations. because i deserve a celebration. bby make that ass clap. on a beach. where’s my ex? call me. no seriously tho, i have a serious topic to discuss today. so get your notebooks out boys. class is in session.
have your ever heard of the left brain vs right brain dominance theory? Essentially, Roger W. Sperr. explains how each side of the brain controls different types of thinking. The left hemisphere is about thinking (logic) and the right hemisphere is about feeling (emotion). OMG. Guess which one I lean towards? hehe. of course, we all use both sides of our brain to live life every day, but people tend to lean one way or another for the most part. i like to think of left-brainers as a computer system (processing and analyzing the world around us) while the right-brainers are like a kaleidoscope (taking in the beauty of life and feeling/creating). we’re clearly experiencing two different realities tho. lol
This image depicts the difference pretty nicely! Literally ying to my yang. compling the world. think instagram. the left brainers made the app & make it work and the right-brainers are keeping everyone on it with their pretty art.
so apparently, not only do right and left-brainers operate on different operating systems, but the language we speak is different too. so you’re telling me i can’t even understand you? omg frustrating. i see why people hang out with ppl who are just like them. lol skewed perspective of the world, but i get it. we do things differently. live life differently. so there’s lot of room for confusion. so i read this book by Rebecca Cutter, and it made a lot of things make sense. even my work relationships have flourished more. highly recommend. yay psychology 💜
as a right-brainer myself, I typically date other right-brainers. hi barbie. hi ken. i love dating artists. it’s always an EXPERIENCE! capital letters. ladies if you haven’t try it before you die. cause romance isn’t dead bby. they are still inventing it.
from singers, to photographers (goodness they take the best photos of me), painters, digital artists. they don’t call me a MUSE for no reason. let’s make art babe. so saying that to say, i’ve never had issues understanding them. we were one and the same. deeply emotionally connected & high off vibes. your right brain is my right brain. the good life. i miss it, but no more artists for me. i’m a big girl now. i’m looking for who has the master plan? i’ll be the inspiration. so i fell for a left-brainer (which is odd bc they have never been my type & i thought they were boring tbh) & it turned my brain inside out. i couldn’t understand a tinnggg about him not even the way he processed anything. i was so confused yet equally intrigued. & i wanted to learn so much bc i knew nothing at all. he was my favorite book with no ending. it was like i was trying to solve a rubik’s cube & i’m sure he was too between my deep sea of emotions, aura, and magic. because there’s nothing logicil about that. right? according to rebecca, “it’s when opposites hook up, the real sparks often fly. The chemistry comes from being very different.” according to my data, i would conclude that she is correct. anywho, when it was all said & done, i was so tired of my mess that i deleted my instagram (this is a very big part of my life), completely stopped dating (that includes my fav camera man) and decided to refocus and commit my life to christ. sike.THERAPY. no distractions. abstinent all 2024. all focus. fought my demons. almost died. literally. have you seen deliverance? bc b.itch I was delivered. cause ain’t no way i keep getting what i pray for and deliberately sabotage it every single time. like girl.i’m sick of me. i’ve done it about 50 eleven times now. it’s gotta end. 2024.
because trauma creates FEAR. maybe i was so intrigued by this person bc he was everything i wasn’t. funny enough, EMDR therapy connected both sides of my brain. it helps you reprocess your traumatic memories with your left brain (logic) and right brain (emotions) so that your nervous system won’t be retriggered in present day. talk about healing. that sh.t almost killed me. i’m not kidding. i had to reprocess everything i’ve ever ran away from & it was intense.B.tch i cried so many times. talk about intense emotional labor, but i finally closed the chapter to my self-sobating ways. no literally, that’s what we were working on.
anywho, now that my left-brain is on board. i’ve been using logic way more even in emotional situations bc that’s where it counts. i’ve cut off a lot of my friends. i’m learning to put myself first. wow. i’ve been analyzing a lot and even strategizing. i’m grateful for using my left brain more optimally. who is she? whole within herself? now, i’m still loving, creative, and free but with more structure. one of the key things i’ve been working on is trusting my intuition more. bc there was a glitch in the matrix. i didn’t always trust her. her divine magic was just too on point sometimes. i would be like get tf outta here… how did i know that? that is not very right brain of me. not very demure. not classy. anywho, fixed the glitch. & I guess the real union I was looking for was integrating with myself. and if trauma creates fear, i guess i’m not afraid of myself because i’ve healed.
